Three Steps to Waste Your Marketing Dollar
Your brand is guaranteed to be flavorless and inconspicuous when you follow these three proven tactics.
1. Appeal to the Lowest Common Denominator
If you want to be sure that your audience understands your awesome value propositions, remember to KISS—keep it simple stupid.
Why bother segmenting your audience to target dialogues that really hit home when you can homogenize everything about your business into some dribble that even a fool can understand?
Because at least some of your customers could be idiots. They’re your lowest common denominator and you don’t want to miss even one of them.
2. Market to the Exception, Not the Rule
You might have an advertising idea that seems perfect. An idea that will surely provoke interest and drive sales.
But are you 100% sure you might not provoke ire as well?
If even one person were to perceive your idea as being a little controversial, slightly racy, or potentially politically incorrect, you may be at risk for being noticed. That would be awful.
3. Follow the Leader
You know that internationally-known business in your industry that you envy, the one that’s worth about a trillion dollars?
Impersonate their marketing! That’ll show them!
Their brand is famous because their marketing is so brilliant. The fact that their advertising budget alone could buy several struggling European Union countries has nothing to do with it.
But if you find yourself struggling for a market leader to copy, go all the way and try Walmart. Remember all those great Walmart commercials, the ones with happy families shopping at Walmart? Pure genius.
You could spend time trying to come up with a marketing plan that’s focused on some silly thing that is actually unique to your business, but that won’t beat Walmart! Your best bet is to produce a low-budget simulation of the big dog’s brand and hope someone notices the similarities.